Writer’s Block

Writer’s Block

Hello peeps,

Long time no see.

It’s funny how easily we can get caught in the rush of life and forget to work on our personal projects, isn’t it?

Every week I set for myself the goal of sitting and working on my blog, and every week something else came up, something that it would be more important or more urgent, or let’s be honest, I was just tired and didn’t want to think. Who hasn’t felt that way, right?

Also, lately I haven’t been in touch with my creative side. In other words, I’ve been feeling a massive writer’s block, and haven’t been able to shake that feeling off.

I keep saying to myself, “don’t worry, you will write when you feel creative again.” But that just doesn’t happen. You know why? Because writing is a craft. It’s like a muscle that you have to keep exercising to get stronger, even on those days that you feel lazy and not wanting to go to the gym. So the best way to push past this block is to get back at exercising my writing muscle, which is what brings me here today.

I just need to remember to be patient with myself, because the strength and ability won’t come right away. So, today I just wanted to tell you that it’s okay to sometimes feel blocked, or uninspired, or set you personal projects aside for a while. As long as you don’t get stuck in that loop and don’t put yourself together to pull you out of it.

Take a breath, accept that this things happen, but don’t get used to the feeling, work you way back to focusing on you and your goals. And don’t forget, be patient.

Much love,

Fefe

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1/4 of a Century

1/4 of a Century

Hello guys,

So on April 18th I turned 25, which means I’m one quarter of a century old. That’s right, I’m not on my early twenties anymore.

But, I’m glad I’m aging because I have been learning and growing so much, and like I always say, change is good.

For this special age, I’ve decided to create a bucket list of 25 things I must do on the year of my 25th birthday.

I’ve written down a wide range of things, from doing hang-gliding, to learning how to drive stick shift, to getting a tattoo. So far I have seven things completed, but I still have many more to finish.

It’s been fun so far, and the best part is that I’ve shared my list with my friends, so not only they help me complete my list, but also I have a commitment of finishing it because other people beside me know about my challenge.

I’ve been reading a book called The Speed of Trust by Stephen Covey, and he discusses how in order to be trusted we need to trust ourselves. And sometimes we mine our own trust by setting up goals and not accomplishing them, like for example when we set the alarm earlier to go workout but we wake up, turn it off, and just go back to sleep. This small act is making ourselves less trustworthy, and even worse, is making us stop trusting ourselves.

So, I encourage you to try doing the same thing. You know those things you always wanted to do but was always too lazy, too busy, or just forgot to do it? Write them down now and challenge yourself to complete them. See it as a mission and set a date for you to complete your list.

I bet you will feel more accomplished and empowered just like I have been feeling.

Peace always,

Fe.

“The Only One” Girl

“The Only One” Girl

Hi guys,

 

I’ve written many poems in my life, but never had the courage to show or post it for anyone to see, so in my new mantra of trying new things and taking risks, I’ve decided to share this little one.

It started coming to shape in my head in one of my many walks from the airplane to the baggage claim, while I was listening to Teddy Geiger’s song “For You I Will” and it sort of just came to life. Little by little I breathed more soul to it, and I was able to finish it tonight. So I hope you enjoy it and that maybe it touches you like it touched me.

“The Only One” Girl

By Fernanda Lemos

I’m the girl in a music video,

the one who walks around with distant eyes and a distracted smile.

A thousand worlds inhabit her mind,

but she can’t seem to fit into the one she lives in.

I’m the girl who people say that she should experience more of life,

but who, perhaps, just feels and sees life in a different perspective than everyone else.

I’m the girl in a portrait,

frozen in space and time as if she doesn’t belong here,

or there, nor anywhere.

I’m the girl in an adventure book,

strong and fierce, but not quite real,

not quite tangible, and somehow quite damaged.

I’m the girl whose eyes can scare you,

because they carry the weight of all the expectations her mouth can’t pronounce.

I’m the girl that tries to pretend she doesn’t believe in love,

but who secretly hurts with how the world seems to have forgotten all about the magic of it.

I’m the girl that cries alone in her bedroom about her loss,

but who you will see smiling and pretending to be okay,

because she refuses to look weak.

I’m the girl who feels as if she wasn’t good enough,

when you were more than enough for her.

As if she lacked a secret ingredient,

always blend, always overlooked.

I’m this girl,

I’m that girl,

I’m any girl,

But I’m never “the only one” girl.

Why Being in Love Means Being a Fool?

Why Being in Love Means Being a Fool?

I’ve been thinking about love lately, not just love but feelings in general. How many times I’ve seen friends being in love and hearing that they are a fool for it? And the more I think about it, the more terrified I become with the conclusion that people are so afraid of feeling something that they rather hurt someone else instead of being vulnerable and be hurt. Even worse: people are so self-centered that they can’t see outside their range.

I’m not talking about guys being jerks, or girls being shallow, or none of those typical things you might hear. I’m talking about people in general. About how one person will try everything to grab your attention, while you are after someone else, and that person is after someone else, so we never find an end to that circle.

In a world where girls fight the standards to scream their independency, guys have to learn more and more how to live and share the duties of a home, where people are so “connected” instantly and language barriers are broken, still we seem to drift more and more apart from one another. Why is that?

I feel like people are scared of wanting something. Even if they say “that’s how I want someone”, they might run away when that person comes popping in their lives, because they might not be ready for that. Or better yet, they might not  be ready to have someone who will have so much power over them, because knowing someone may hurt you is extremely scary. So we close ourselves up in our own world, gathering a list of lovers one right after the other, always having someone to massage our ego, so we don’t have to face the truth that one person might make you feel more than all those others.

We say we want something, but when we find it, we build walls up against it. Doesn’t make sense, right? I’m not saying that we should live like the romance books, where all is perfect and love is stronger than anything else. Those things are beautiful for the stories, but they are not real. Those people are not real, and no matter how many flaws a writer can give them, you can’t flush them out of the page.

No. I’m talking about people who will make you happy and laugh, who will disappoint you because you create certain expectations in your head, who will support you and fail you, who will fight you, and, sometimes, who will just be there, with none of these extreme feelings that you encounter in the pages of a novel.

Perhaps you will meet someone who will make you feel differently, and I pray that you have the courage to tell that person how you feel–which most of us lack to do. We just keep pretending that we don’t care until that person walks out of our life.

If not, you might just keep living life like a ghost, just bumping into the next person and the next, to keep pretending that you are strong or wanted.

I’m not saying that we are incomplete without someone else, not by far. I believe we all come to this life as a whole, and we can live, breathe, build a career, follow our dreams all on our own. What I’m saying is, maybe someone could be there with you, cheering you, challenging you, or helping you put your feet on the ground sometimes.

So my wish for you is to be weak and be a fool. But don’t be a fool with shut eyes and closed heart, because you might miss something or someone.

 

Re-learning How to be Creative.

Re-learning How to be Creative.

Ok, so let me ask you something. Creativity is a talent, right?

Nope.

I used to think that too, until recently I’ve stumbled upon a course taught here in Brazil by a comedian Entrepreneur, Murilo Gun, who decided it was time to break the traditional thought that some people are creative while others aren’t.

His whole course is based upon the idea that everyone is born creative, but as we grow up, we start getting blocked from the way society makes us behave. We lose that childlike innocent creativity where every thing we see is considered an input for creative thoughts.

I have been suffering with creative block since I started working in a more traditional logical job, and haven’t been my normal self since then. So, I decided to take a shot at the course to see if it would help me re-learn how to be creative.

The course hasn’t started yet, however, all the “students” already created a group on facebook and on Whatsapp, so we could start getting to know each other and share our experiences of the course as we move forward.

For me, just that experience is already worthy enough. Imagine about a hundred people, from different cities, backgrounds, ages, jobs, hobbies, personalities, but all with one goal of re-learning how to be creative? It’s the most incredible experience ever!

Everyone is so funny, and interactive, and they all have something different to offer or to teach you that sometimes it’s even hard to keep up. I’ve been having a blast just by knowing all these crazy people just like me, and sort of felt back on first day of college where everyone was friends with each other and we were all so united. Some of those people are still my friends, and I can only hope to come out with more friends from this new experience.

I have a feeling that they will help me towards my creative path, and that we will all have a great experience together.

So if you are feeling like you need a change, why don’t you try starting a new class somewhere? Something different and unique, with people who have the same goal as you? Get out of your shell and try meeting new people! If you are open minded and respectful of everyone’s differences, you can only come out with more knowledge about human beings and perhaps you can even change your mind about pre-conceived ideas.

Happy Creative thoughts,

Fernanda.

 

 

The power of writing

The power of writing

Writing for me is more than a form of expression. It is also a form of release.

Once I really started writing, developed my own stories and got attached to my characters, I realized how some of my own feelings, desires, fears and frustrations became real on the page.

I was going through a really tough time, and somehow by putting my own characters in my situation, I could see things from a whole new perspective. Writing helped me accept and understand certain events and people of my life.

Kiera Cass, writer of The Selection Series, once said the same thing, about how putting her characters in her own situations, helped her deal with her problems.

Somehow you are able to detach youserlf from the whole picture, and take a look at things from a different point of view. By doing that you release yourself from those feelings that chain you down. You get the sensation that you lock your inner demons on those pages, instead of battling them inside yourself.

If you get people to read your work, you might even help them deal with their own demons. I let a friend read one of my works, and she said that what happened to my character hit her right in her wound. She saw herself in my character, and she felt real relief when my character said out loud everything she always wanted to say.

For me seeing how much my work impacted someone made all the effort, all the pain and all the joy I went through that inspired my story, to somehow be worth it. That’s what telling stories is all about. It’s about sharing experiences, taking people to other places, helping each other, healing old wounds, and giving courage to those who need it.

I write to understand the world, and better yet, to understand myself.

Writing is a journey, and reading is a escape.

Be who you are.

Be who you are.

I was recently talking to a friend about how after moving away to another country, and living by myself, helped me solidify the person that I am.

What happens is, when we grow up, people tend to tell us who we are based on certain reactions, opinions, tastes that we’ve had through that period of time. But most people forget that we keep getting new experiences, new inputs of situations, and we are exposed to different people and places. We are constantly being shaped by those things, and evolving new characteristcs to our personality. However, those who always knew us -and who sometimes haven’t changed as much- react negatively to our changes, and say that this isn’t who we are. But who are we, really? Are we supposed to be only one thing during our entire lives?

After reading the novel Paper Towns, by John Green, I was struck by something discussed in the story, the fact that “people are mirrors instead of windows”. My understanding of the idea is that people reflect what others want to see in them, instead of being windows where we can see through them. We reflect what others want from us for so long that when we do become windows, those around us will believe we are not acting like ourselves, even though we couldn’t be truer to who we are.

If any of you has ever had the opportunity of going away from your hometown, family, or old friends, even for just a little while, you probably will understand that when we don’t have people’s expectations, we can shape ourselves to be who we want to be, or to show who, in fact, we really are.

Coming of age usually relates to leaving adolescence and stepping into the adult world. But maybe we are always coming of age. We change and leave things behind all the time. Change is scary, but it can also be exciting. You never know what new things will come into your life because of a new decision you have made.

 

So be who you are, keep changing, because once we stop changing that’s when we stop living.